PUBLIC SPEAKING- HOW TO GET RID OF NERVES

Public speaking is an art where the speaker informs and influences and motivates an audience on certain issues. A good speech can work wonders

Public speaking is an art where the speaker or the orator informs and influences the audience on a certain issue. The speech is deliberate and always purposeful. A wise orator concerns more with what his speech can do rather than what his speech should be. A good speech can motivate certain groups of people, clarify and solve out confusions and open up interest on a certain issue.

 How to get rid of nerves: It is natural to be nervous before delivering a speech to a large gathering.  It shows that you value the audience. Even the greatest orators of the world commit errors. There are certain ways to reduce this nervousness and the fear of public speaking. Some ways to counter it are given below:

• Know the audience and subject matter: An orator should know what the audience want and what type they are. He should also know the subject matter well to give a new and a meaningful message to the public. The matter should not be based on his personnel ideas and thoughts, but it should rather be public centred.

• Make the speech entertaining: Audience love anything entertaining. So, deliver the speech in an entertaining way. This will not only drive the attention of the audience towards your speech but it will also boost confidence in you.

• Practice and prepare well: Prepare and practice well before you go to the stage for a speech. If need be, call some of your friends and perform in front of them and get the feedback. You can work on points where it is necessary. Once you are prepared, you will have confidence and fear of no one.

• Stay positive and be confident: Audience are there to hear what you say. Stay positive even if you have committed an error as you can learn only through mistakes.  Do contact your eyes with the audience, and act confidently. If confidence is there, you can deliver the message effectively to the audience. It will also give a sense of involvement to the audience.

• Be yourself and relax: Never imitate others, just be you while delivering a speech. A natural thing lasts long and the audience always love to hear anything natural. Don’t think that you would commit a mistake and don’t let any negative thoughts dominate you, just relax and ease your tension and fear and deliver the message. Use gestures and move around a little to emphasize on some points and grab the attention of the audience.

You can have all the audience at the edges of their seats only when you bring out the self in you and deliver a genuine piece of speech. They will listen to every word you deliver with full enthusiasm and interest. A good speech has the power to work miracles.

WINNER's EDGE - WHAT SEPARATES WINNERS FROM LOSERS

Winners are never disheartend with obstacles & lead by example in what they do with focus & confidence

Everyone wants to succeed in life. But not everyone achieves success despite huge efforts. Winners, as often said, don’t do different things but they do things differently. They are never disheartened by the small obstacles that come in their ways. They are very practical and lead others by example.

   How winners are different from losers

• Hard work and consistency: 
  Hard work and consistency is the key to success. There is no alternative to it. It is often said that luck has a role in success but in reality it is just the hard work that counts. Luck has nothing to do with success. Hard work builds up the caliber and determination for success. It prepares you to face the adversities of life and shine out later.

• Never give up attitude or perseverance:
  Another important thing to succeed is perseverance. Success is not easily achievable; it needs huge efforts, time and one has to overcome certain difficulties and obstacles of life. One should never run away in the midway. Hesitation and doubts should be avoided and one should grab the opportunity with both hands at the appropriate time.

• Focus and determination:
  There is an old saying, “Rolling stone gathers no moss” and this particularly states the importance of focus and determination. One should observe a particular thing and focus on it with full determination. Those who are likely to change and never adamant to anything will never accomplish things in life or anywhere.

• Strategic planning and deliverance:
  Without a proper planning, no one is going to succeed in life, be it a minor household work or a complex corporate one. One has to understand things properly, then check out if any other person is doing the same thing you do, find out how they are doing and how you do it. After this, one can act accordingly to excel in life. If a thing is known properly, deliverance will come up automatically.

• Self-confidence:
  No matter how well one knows a thing or not, if she/he is not confident, he can’t deliver properly and capitalise on anything. Confidence can be achieved through practice only. You are what you think you are. If one thinks that he is capable of doing something, he can and if he thinks he can’t, he can’t. A successful person always stands tall with full confidence.

• Time management:
  Winners are really shrewd and wise. They observe and plans things, perform and deliver in the right time and set the goals in a meaningful manner. None will succeed if a thing is not well managed in time.

• Practical:
  Practice makes a man perfect and winners always are practical. They think and do what they think. They are practical in every aspect of life. They are hardworking, confident, positive, strategic, determined and persevering.

• Positive thinking:
  Positive thinking is the constructive way of thinking anything that comes in life. Winners are positive and never expect that they would fail in what they do. They always stay positive even if they fail and never give up thoughts to succeed somehow. A positive mind always finds a way out and motivates the person to succeed.

9 DAILY HABITS THAT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPIER

Happiness is the only true measure of personal success. Making other people happy is the highest expression of success, but it's almost impossible to make others happy if you're not happy yourself.

With that in mind, here are nine small changes that you can make to your daily routine that, if you're like most people, will immediately increase the amount of happiness in your life:

1. Start each day with expectation.

If there's any big truth about life, it's that it usually lives up to (or down to) your expectations. Therefore, when you rise from bed, make your first thought: "something wonderful is going to happen today." Guess what? You're probably right.

2. Take time to plan and prioritize.

The most common source of stress is the perception that you've got too much work to do.  Rather than obsess about it, pick one thing that, if you get it done today, will move you closer to your highest goal and purpose in life. Then do that first.

3. Give a gift to everyone you meet.

I'm not talking about a formal, wrapped-up present. Your gift can be your smile, a word of thanks or encouragement, a gesture of politeness, even a friendly nod. And never pass beggars without leaving them something. Peace of mind is worth the spare change.

4. Deflect partisan conversations.

Arguments about politics and religion never have a "right" answer but they definitely get people all riled up over things they can't control. When such topics surface, bow out by saying something like: "Thinking about that stuff makes my head hurt."

5. Assume people have good intentions.

Since you can't read minds, you don't really know the "why" behind the "what" that people do. Imputing evil motives to other people's weird behaviors adds extra misery to life, while assuming good intentions leaves you open to reconciliation.

6. Eat high quality food slowly.

Sometimes we can't avoid scarfing something quick to keep us up and running. Even so, at least once a day try to eat something really delicious, like a small chunk of fine cheese or an imported chocolate. Focus on it; taste it; savor it.

7. Let go of your results.

The big enemy of happiness is worry, which comes from focusing on events that are outside your control. Once you've taken action, there's usually nothing more you can do. Focus on the job at hand rather than some weird fantasy of what might happen.

8. Turn off "background" TV.

Many households leave their TVs on as "background noise" while they're doing other things. The entire point of broadcast TV is to make you dissatisfied with your life so that you'll buy more stuff. Why subliminally program yourself to be a mindless consumer?

9. End each day with gratitude.

Just before you go to bed, write down at least one wonderful thing that happened. It might be something as small as a making a child laugh or something as huge as a million dollar deal. Whatever it is, be grateful for that day because it will never come again.

POSITIVE THINKING - YOUR KEY TO SUCCESS

Did you know that positive thinking is one of the most important keys to achieving success?

With this key, it is easier to gain success, inner peace, improved relationships, better health, happiness and satisfaction. This key, also helps in the daily affairs of life, making everything flow more smoothly, and with less friction. A positive attitude makes life look brighter and promising.

Positive thinking is contagious. People around you pick your mental moods and are affected accordingly. Think about happiness, good health and success, and you will cause people to like you and desire to help you, because they enjoy the vibrations that a positive mind emits.
In order to make positive thinking yield results, you need to develop a positive attitude toward life, expect a successful outcome of whatever you do, but also take any necessary actions to ensure your success.

Effective positive thinking that brings results is much more than just repeating a few positive words, or telling yourself that everything is going to be all right. It has to be your predominant mental attitude. It is not enough to think positively for a few moments, and then letting fears and lack of belief enter your mind. Some effort and inner work are necessary.
Are you willing to make a real inner change?
Are you willing to change the way you think?
Are you willing to develop a mental power that can positively affect you, your environment and the people around you?

TIPS FOR DEVELOPING THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING - YOUR KEY TO SUCCESS:

1. Use only positive words while thinking and while talking. Use words such as, 'I can', 'I am able', 'it is possible', 'it can be done', etc.
2. Allow only feelings of happiness, strength and success into your awareness.
3. Disregard and ignore negative thoughts. Refuse to think such thoughts, by substituting them with constructive, happy thoughts. Every time a negative thought finds its way into your mind, immediately replace it with a positive thought.
4. In your conversation, use words that bring forth feelings and mental images of strength, happiness and success.
5. Before starting with any plan or action, visualize clearly in your mind its successful outcome. If you visualize with concentration and faith, you will be amazed at the results.
6. Read at least one page of inspiring book every day.
7. Watch movies that make you feel happy.
8. Minimize the time you listen to the news and read the newspapers.
9. Associate yourself with people who think positively.
10. Always sit and walk with your back straight. This will strengthen your confidence and inner strength.
11. Walk, swim or engage in some other physical activity. This helps to develop a more positive attitude.

Think positive and expect only favorable results and situations, even if your current circumstances are not as you wish them to be. In time, your mental attitude will affect your external life and circumstances, and change them accordingly.

HOW TO GET THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

Be ready for love. Being in a relationship takes time, commitment, and vulnerability. Loving yourself first allows you to share love with others. Strong, loving relationships are built on trust, honesty, and communication. You must be willing to meet these expectations if you are looking for someone to call "the love of your life."

Recognize your standards. We've heard the phrase, "love has no limits." In reality, however, a few limits might not be a bad idea. Although it's unfair to judge a person entirely by his or her flaws (past or present), there are probably certain kinds of thoughts or behaviors that you know would ultimately hinder your compatibility with someone. More importantly, there are probably certain kinds of thoughts or behaviors that you WOULD find important in your significant other.

Be ready to differentiate between loving a person and loving the affection he or she shows you. Being in love feels good. This feeling can sometimes overpower true thoughts about our actual partner. Pay attention to whether you can distinguish between a person's intrinsic qualities and the ones you impose on him or her.

Be in the right place at the right time. There are probably places where you feel your personality flourishes -- during happy hour with friends, at the park, at a concert, maybe even at the library. Be there.

Strive for emotional intimacy before physical intimacy. If you are looking to call someone the "love of your life," an emotional bond is key. Rushing the physical side of a relationship does not necessarily prevent an emotional bond, but it can make the emotional landscape more difficult to navigate.

Trust yourself. Be comfortable taking your time. Be patient and discerning in your judgments. At the same time, be perceptive and open to new ideas about what you define as "love."

HOW TO BECOME MORE ATTRACTIVE

Attraction is a funny thing. If you’re like many, you may believe physical appearance is the driving force behind attractiveness. If you're in that group and hold that belief, you'd be wrong.

While physical appearance plays a large role in how you are perceived, your thoughts and how you choose to carry yourself remain the dominant power at the wheel. The truth is, you don’t need the hottest style of clothing to be attractive. You don’t need to be on the latest diet to become irresistible. With the right mindset you can unleash your natural beauty within. How?

• Be Real
  A great deal of people try to hide their true self by subscribing to false identities. When you do this, not only do you obstruct your inbred magnificence, you release a sense of falseness. Fakery is never inviting.
  
  There’s no reason to hide your faults or pretend they don’t exist. Embrace your true qualities; no one expects you to be perfect.
  
  Those who are true to themselves are inherently going to be more attractive. Never be embarrassed of falling short. Being real means accepting who you are and loving yourself as a result. Only when you love yourself can you genuinely begin to love others. Nothing is more sexy then love.


• Talk With Purpose
  There's something attractive about those who have a purpose behind their words. Avoid talking just for the sake of filler. When you talk, speak with authority. Allow your soul to speak rather than your pleasure driven ego.
  
  Abraham Lincoln reportedly once said, "Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."


• Listen
  In an increasingly opinionated world, the skill of genuinely listening has decreased substantially, therefore learning to do so is imperative. When you talk, really talk, and when you listen, really listen. Suspend judgment and open your heart to receive. Talking to a wall is never attractive.
  
  There's something magnetic about one who cares enough to truly listen.


• Laugh
  When you laugh, you emit the inner beauty of your being to all those around. While it's certainly possible to over do it, laughing is virtually always looked at in a positive light. A sense of humor is alluring. No one likes a grouch.


• Smile
  Combined with laughing, smiling is one of the easiest ways to radiate attractiveness. When you smile, you open yourself up to connect with all those around. Did you know the most successful individuals are the one's that smile most?


• Don’t Complain
  If you’re like the majority of society, a great deal of your thoughts and conversations involves complaining. Talk about a turn off. Do everything in your power not to complain. Those who complain attract more situations to complain about. Instead, embrace each and every moment as a gift from the universe. Don't expect to glow if you instead to choose to whine.


• Feel Attractive
  How can you expect to be attractive if you don’t feel that you are? Each and everyone of us is overflowing with natural beauty. When you feel attractive, you release attractiveness. However, there's a fine line between confidence and cockiness. Always avoid the latter. When you sincerely believe you are an attractive individual, which by nature you are, those around you won't be able to help but think the same.


• Be Open
  No one likes someone who is closed off and not accessible. Be open to create authentic relationships and watch the connections unfold. Far too often people feel as if they are too good for someone, but the reality is we are all part of a single cell: humanity. When you allow others to connect with you, you instantly become that much more appealing. Be open and willing and watch as your authentic relationships manifest. :)


• Walk With Your Head Up
  How do you walk? Do you walk with your head down? A simple shift in the way you walk will do wonders in how you are perceived in the public eye. Confidence goes a long way. Look up and observe the beauty of the world, and in turn you will begin to radiate it.

EASY WAY TO BUILD SELF CONFIDENCE

1. Dress Sharp

Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes, and being cognizant of the latest styles.
This doesn’t mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. In long run this decreases spending because expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet.

2. Walk Faster

One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to examine her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important.

3. Good Posture

Similarly, the way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They aren’t enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You’ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.

4. Personal Commercial

One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. You can fill this need by creating a personal commercial. Write a 30-60 second speech that highlights your strengths and goals. Then recite it in front of the mirror aloud (or inside your head if you prefer) whenever you need a confidence boost.

5. Gratitude

When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, unique skills, loving relationships, and positive momentum. You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.

6. Compliment other people

When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.

7. Sit in the front row

In schools, offices, and public assemblies around the world, people constantly strive to sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.

8. Speak up

During group discussions many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. This fear isn’t really justified. Generally, people are much more accepting than we imagine. In fact most people are dealing with the exact same fears. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts, and recognized as a leader by your peers.

9. Work out

Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physcial appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.

10. Focus on contribution

Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence and allow you to contribute with maximum efficiency. The more you contribute to the world the more you’ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.